Monday, April 26, 2010

I've Lost my Best Friend

I've Lost my Best Friend

The other day I was in my Veterinarian office with my two Standard Poodles Thomas & Evan. The office was extremely busy and full of cats dogs and their owners a typically Saturday afternoon for my vets office. Busy! My boys were in for a booster vaccination and then home.

In the far corner of the waiting room there was a woman with a friend or family member consoling her.She was crying God how I remember that feeling my heart went out to her as I know what she was faced with and all animal lovers are not truly ready to face this no matter how many times we have had this happen.The decision to have to put our Pet to sleep.

She was taken into a room and while this was taken place It brought back my memories of my Standard Timothy and Zackary. Timothy was my rescue from a breeder who had finished this poodle and somehow Timothy ended up in the wrong hands. Many years had past and Timothy ended up in a poodle Rescue out west and was on the verge of being put to sleep. Somehow the breeder found out and flew out to retrieve her poodle that was of her breeding and found a debilitating Poodle so she brought him home several weeks later I received him and nursed him back to health until months later he became very ill Rushing him to the vets we ended with a trip too the university to have a grim diagnoses they gave Timothy a year to live.

With much love and care Timothy manage to live 3 years and past away from Lymphoma this came on so sudden but my vet felt that Timothy had so many things going on for a long time that it was great that he lives as long as he did to the age of 14

A month later my other Standard Zackary had digressed rapidly and it was time to have to put him to sleep this ripped my heart out as Zackary was with me for a long time from age 3 to 16 and it was breaking my heart to have to let him go.
Working in health care in the operating room I have seen over and over patients family's wanting to keep Grandma or Mom or Dad alive when perhaps it would be a blessing to remove from all pain if they would pass on it just is not a easy decision to have be faced with. Thus this passes on to our pets.

I left work in tears as I could not stayed focused and I scrub Neuro Surgery so it was best that I stay home in doing so it became time

My dogs and cats are my world and they are my family I don't claim that I become attach and since my dogs or cats become old I put them to sleep no that is not it at all. First off they are more then just a pet they are my best friend my family and I would give a kidney if I could. Why do I feel this way?because they give UN condition love and seem to have a vast understanding of what is right or wrong and always are forgiving.

When Zackary passed on I was lost both my boys in less then a month it was very hard coming home and not having my boys hang with me and no more Sunday rides which became a regular when going through my divorce they knew my dis pare and would not leave my side all this was gone

The opportunity came around to have have another Standard Poodle and thus Thomas came into my life a beautiful 8 month old puppy full of life! Hmm the Key word Life it was missing in mine as I was so consumed with the loss of my boys I could not have any room for Life. Was I replacing my boys? No not at all.I was allowing and opening my heart to except a puppy who was willing and wanting to make me happy and thus he did.

I have not forgotten my boys Timothy and Zackary but the hurt and pain have been replace with loving memories and the ability to move in different direction

Now I am blessed with Thomas full litter mate brother Evan and both boys are my joy. They are full of life and want only to please and I enjoy every moment with them as they are life. Now I have a direction with my boys and have meet some wonderful people along the way. I have grown in a way that allows me to understand the In's and outs of the poodle world and a new friendship has been born.

So when the women went into the room in tears I knew the felling and in my own way I hoped that she finds comfort and gives her best friend the freedom to move into a better light with peace as someday I will be stepping into that room with heavy heart and a decision we are never ready for

Lydia Thomas & Evan


Lydia said...


Karen Deborah said...

So tender. I am right there with you. I lost my sweet best friend 3 years ago and still do not have another dog. My husband hasn't been ready yet but I am. There is nothing like a big poodle they are brilliant and sensitive. My dog died from cancer too. the hardest thing we ever did was put him down, devastating. It sounds like you are a nurse. Me too except I'm not working anymore, like that changes it.

I just want to go read every story about your dogs.